On Being A Muslim

“We are all born with spiritual wings, Islam simply reminds us how to fly.”

The Dot signifies the end but thank you for always starting new journeys with me.

Ramadan Mubarak, my lovelies! This particular blog post has been due for some time now, but I really had issues putting the words together. Nevertheless, we are here now, so let's go.

A couple of months ago, I told someone that I planned on finishing the Quran during Ramadan. He looked at me and laughed, then said, “You do not look like someone who can read the Quran.” I found it funny, to be honest, and assured him that I can read the Quran. Then he asked me if I had completed the Quran, and I said no. If it were before, I would have been sad about it, but at that point, I just found it funny. However, all it did was make me remember the old days.

I don't remember the particular details, but when I was much younger, my mom paid an Alfa to teach us. Then life happened, and we had to move to Ilorin. In Ilorin, my grandma hired someone to teach us and the neighbor's kids too, but he was Hausa, and he kept teaching us in Hausa because the neighbor's kids were Hausa, so we had to stop. After that, we really just gave up until 2016 when my mom decided to enroll my siblings, cousins, and me in Minaret.

Upon arriving there, I was put in this class, only to realize that I was the oldest. I found it very funny, to be honest, and it really hurt me. I was 17 at that time, and most of the kids there were 13 and below. I never had any issues with them at that point because I have always been able to adjust anywhere, until one day we had exams, and the teacher wrote the questions down, and I did not know anything. The children knew that I did not know anything, so they proceeded to help me write my exam.

I still remember the 12-year-old beside me saying, “Aunty Fareedah, ema worry, mo ma bayin ko,” which translates to “Aunty Fareedah, don’t worry, I’ll help you write it.” It hurt, too, and I was embarrassed, but she did the exam for me, and I passed. That was the last time I went to Minaret.

After that, I really just told myself that I would learn to read the Quran myself, and to be honest, I did just that and it worked. I have always been a Muslim, even on days when I was not at my strongest, even on days when I did not wear my hijab. Yes, I was born into Islam, but I have always been of the opinion that you have to find religion yourself to truly become Muslim, and I made sure I did that.

On my birthday, I remember telling my friends that my life was a reflection of a miracle because there are many things and many doors that I never thought I would be able to open, but I did, and I am glad that I did. In all honesty, I always thought of myself as lucky because God has always given me chances, even on days when I thought I did not deserve it. He has always done so, and yes, I cry, and many times I think that I am not doing enough or maybe I am doing too much. But then, even on those sad days, God still lets me know that he is there for me.

In school, I used to think you had to look a certain way or do certain things to be truly Muslim. In fact, sometimes all those “eleha” refused to return my greetings because I only used a scarf to cover my head. Other times, I had issues with my religion because it often felt weird when I saw all those supposed sisters doing things that they were not supposed to do. And until recently, I still had issues with separating the people from the religion.

I recently conversed with this man. He said he went to Saudi in 2015, and one thing he is forever grateful for is the fact that he knew religion before he went there. I always tell people that if you want to be a Muslim, then you have to learn it yourself. Islam is perfect; humans are not.

I really do hope you are still here with me, today is one of those rare days when I am a 100% serious. If you are reading this for the first time then I really do hope this not your last time.

I performed Umrah last year because I felt it was high time I give thanks to God for the wonders he has done in my life, I am glad I did because it really did help me see things in a new light. I really hope you do to.

Hi my name is Dott, I am glad you are here with me and I hope you always are.